I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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