Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
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