I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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