Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
