he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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