I heard we made out
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
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