There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
FUCK WHALES
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
