Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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