Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
