jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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