So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
