ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
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