i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
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