id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize