So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
