okay pat passed out under dana's car
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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