she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
