someone get that fucking seahorse.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Randomize