I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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