So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
