Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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