i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
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