and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
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