It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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