No awkward lesbian experiences without me
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Semen is not good for contacts.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
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