May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Randomize