no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
