Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
It's shark week go big or go home
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
