I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
