yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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