The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize