Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
