so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
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