Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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