my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
