I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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