Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
