You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
