Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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