I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
PANTIES FOUND
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