All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
