I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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