I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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