he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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