Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
