dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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