I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Randomize
