your room smells of hookers.
And success
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
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