i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize