I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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