p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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